With new ownership, restructuring, and a move to their new stadium in South Boston, the Teabag Party (nee Bills) is off to an encouraging start. Ticket sales are trending back up, although this was definitely helped by the attendance of die-hard Biscuits fans at the former Boston team's two thrashings of the new team this season. "I'm officially declaring it a rivalry" stated new head coach Price at his first press conference since the move. "We would have preferred a cross-town rivalry, but we'll be happy to have them back any time. I give all due respect to Mr kurse and Mr Thompson, they've put together a great franchise."

"I'm encouraged by what we've done so far. We've kept the few core players and coaches we want to move ahead with (nod to Karl Vigna). We've also acquired some new talent (nod to Dewitt Dean) and we have become financially healthy so that we can continue to bring quality players to Boston. We've added new plays to the playbook (nod to Hung Henson). Hey folks, he's unconventional, but he somehow finds a way to gain yards. But seriously, we can and will compete in this league. We can and will bring Boston fans the high level of play and entertainment value that they expect and deserve."

"Our play so far this season has been inconsistent, and we will continue to work on that. We've provided the other teams in this league with a few surprises, and we've also had some disappointing games. Our personnel are still adjusting to the new system. Management is still evaluating coaches, players, and the system itself to find the best fit. We are just starting on a path of continuous improvement with this team."

Teabag Party management is ecstatic with the results of 2023 free agency and training camp!

First we want to welcome Theodore Mathis, the former head coach of Minnesota, as our new defensive coordinator. We wish Mr. Charette all the best in his move to Miami.

We want to welcome our new rookie class:
1st round (14) - TE Billy Bogen +16/0
This future star will be working on his pass catching, route running, and run blocking skills as our 3rd string TE and FB this year.
1st round (29) - TE Billy Sweet +10/+6
It's not a secret. We plan to move to a more TE-oriented offense with the "Bookend Billies" in future seasons. Mr. Sweet will be working on his blocking skills.
2nd round - FS Larry Rosario +8/+7
Under the tutelage of Karl Vigna, and paired with rising star Frankie Figueroa, Larry will be bringing decent speed (relative to what we have now) and competent zone defense into our secondary, an area that was sorely neglected under previous management. He might even be starting games by years end.
3rd round CB Larry Fox +17/+7
Although not the fastest CB available, Mr. Fox brings high-level (for a rookie) skills to fill in as a nickle back, strong safety, or outside linebacker.
4th round -
We wish Mr. Korey Hernandez all the best in his new position with the Dorchester Animal Control office, and award him an honorary teabag practice squad jersey!
5th round - MLB Jerry Williams +11/+7
We're still evaluating where Jerry will best fit into our organization, but he definitely has a place here!
6th round - RG Ron Fauntleroy +9/+8
With high speed for a guard, a move to the outside may be in Ron's future.
7th round - WR Charles McDonald +12/+2
We were pleasantly surprised, first to find Charles still available in the seventh round, and also with his camp results.

Praise and congratulations are also due to young boomers MLB Scott Cloud, RB Bill Mills, and QB Dewitt Dean for their efforts during the off season.

With this kind of improvement, the Teabag Party feels ready for a higher level of competition and success in 2023!

Man, I haven't had a camp like that ever. Kudos to you.

Three years ago, the departure of the Thrashers (Biscuits) was traumatic for die-hard Boston football fans. The relocation of a truly mediocre franchise with serious financial issues to Boston - didn't give them much comfort. The Thrashers would show up occasionally for an away game, giving fans a perennial winning team and contender to cheer for, even if it wasn't theirs anymore.

After three building seasons, the Teabag Party is finally giving signs that they may be ready to win over Bostonians. They have cleaned up their cash issues and steadily added talent. They've won their first two games of 2025, including a decisive win over the former Boston champions.

"Lets take this season one game at a time," stated coach Wells. "We are only two games into the season. Of course I am happy with last week's results. Now we are going up against the Broncos next. We need to concentrate on that, because it's no easy task."

Somehow, some way, the Teabaggers have managed to get the best record in the AFC, edging out their divisional rivals, the Thrashers.

"I don't know what to do with myself this week" stated QB Dewitt Dean.

"Take your meds and watch the wild card games on TV" replied coach Wells. "We could really use three straight weeks of good Dewitt."

"We can probably count on facing the Arkansas boys again," he continued. "We took them by surprise week one with a QB in his first NFL game. They made some adjustments, and beat us handily in the revenge match."

"Two of our defensive stars, Thanh Peterson and Franky Figeroa, are likely to miss at least one playoff game. Even if we manage to get by the Thrashers (or your choice of other tough competitors) in the playoffs, the NFC has racked up a +50 cross-conference record. We need to just keep taking it one game at a time, and see how far we get."

The biggest news this off-season has been a dispute between coach Wells and owner Tarquin the Dark over personnel. "We're continuing to move ahead, turning this team into a consistent contender" stated Mr. Dark. "Once we do that, we may allow Wells more control over personnel, both on coaching staff and players."

Four coaches were replaced by upper management.
Dennis Bonner, most recently backfield coach for the Terror, and previously Offensive Coordinator for the Thrashers, has been brought in to replace Jorge Whaley as Defensive Coordinator. Other replacements were at Quarterbacks, Kickers, and Defensive Line.

With the additions of Wesley Lara, Frank Purdy, and James Penn - we continue to emphasize "heavy hands" on our offense. We've made minor adjustments to bolster both lines. The big surprise this season was no moves to improve the secondary.

Don't make me blade you to get a pop

Your torments call us like dogs in the night. And we do feed, and feed well. To stuff ourselves on other people's torments. And butter our plain bread with delicious pain... "Funerals, marriages, lost loves, lonely beds" that is our diet. We **** that misery and find it sweet. - Mr. Dark, Something Wicked This Way Comes

Top 5 book for me. Maybe top 3.

Sounds like my lowered expectations for this season's 'baggers. I won't blame Dean with his self-medicating bipolarity. He's just not seeing open receivers other than the TEs. At least the D is still getting some INTs, they'll have to be my bread and butter for now.