Turmoil for Los Angeles Red Dragon?
-Los Angeles, California

In a series of shocking moves, Los Angeles Red Dragon owner billyvan has shaken up his two time AFC champion organization. Head coach Bryan Patterson, with a career 29-9 record and two trips to the Super Bowl has been fired as head coach. He is replaced by former Atlanta offensive coordinator Wayne Thomas. The Red Dragon also released QB Earnest Bearce, their number 1 pick from the expansion draft just two seasons ago. Billyvan also made public statements about how next season the offense and defense would be upgraded. However, after one week of free agency, of the five new defensive players the Red Dragon have brought in, not one has a default rating over 75 and all were signed for contracts with average annual values of less than $400,000. Red Dragon fans are confused and worried that their owner isn't backing up his big talk of big changes with his wallet. League sources report that the Red Dragon went around to dozens of free agents offering six year deals at minimum salaries - 6 years for $1.7 million total, which some agents described off the record as "insulting." Billyvan has promised to not go down in defeat in a third consecutive Super Bowl. Red Dragon fans will be interested to see how their offseason moves pan out.

WE shall see.

In further Red Dragon news, offensive coordinator Richard Cozart has left the team and is joining the San Francisco Demons as their new head coach. The turnover in Los Angeles continues.

The Warthogs, after 2 years of hinting towards a move, have now replaced it's HC, OC, and DC positions, as well.

Historic Day in Jacksonville
-Jacksonville, Florida

History was made this week in Jacksonville. For the first time in league history, fans left the stadium smiling and celebrating a win. After two 0-16 seasons and a 0-3 start, 35 games of futility, Jacksonville can finally put one in the win column. Uncertain of how to react after an actual win, fans were shell shocked at stupefied. One fan said, "I don't know whether to riot or cry." He also added that it was "the best day of my life!" For the long suffering fans of Jacksonville, it has been a day they have long awaited and now can relish in. Jacksonville will try for its first ever two game win streak next week against the undefeated Boston Biscuits.

It's actually 35 games of futility, put some respeck on their name!

Sacksonville win streak capped at 1!
~Jacksonville, Florida

Hot on the heels of the first, historic victory in franchise history the Jaguars were unable to double up, instead falling narrowly by 9-21 to the unbeaten Boston Biscuits. The Biscuits stymied the Sacksonville pass rush and did just enough on three drives to score TDs, while the Jags saw three promising drives end without points (half, punt, downs). Never the less the former 'Baguars' gave the Crumbs a tough game, a sign that bodes well for the team's future.

At his press conference after the game new owner amalric7 said, "Well frankly one win was more than I expected from this team, and we were all still a little giddy from that epic achievement, so not winning this game was no real surprise...but I'm sure happy with how we competed. There was some talent on this roster when I came in, it was just a pity it was all at two positions - I mean, who the **** acquires 25 QBs and 15 RBs?!? There was some sorry nonsense going on here in the past, for which I blame the government, the league, and the Illuminati. Whoever they are. Rest assured, this team will one day win the SuperBowl. That is a promise."

By the time the assembled press crops had dried their tears of laughter and picked themselves off the floor the owner had left, and we await the result of the Raiders game with breath that is more than a little baited.

Boston Biscuits look more like butter because they're on a roll
by Reporter Newsman

After yesterday's victory, chants rang out from the stands with an uneasy mixture of "MVP!" and "Build that wall!" proving once and for all, Boston fans are racist but extremely dedicated to their sports teams. However, the real story lies not in the backwards fans, but the change in culture around the organization.

After taking over the New England Vince Wilforks three-quarters of the way through a second ailing season (6 combined wins at that time from the 2017-18 seasons). New owner kursetheday casually sauntered in with a vision to clean up the team and build an organization that could thrive in more ways than just white privilege.

The first order of business was replacing a TE serving as the team's kicker, and well, yes, that's just how bad things were. Instantly, coaches and players took notice, knowing very well their livelihoods were at stake; some would not make the cut and paid the price. However, not all was lost; a small coterie of players and staff were kept on--even extended--because owner kursetheday believes "leadership starts at the top."

After winning the last two regular season games and ending the 2018 season 5-11, the newly minted Boston Biscuits are now turning heads in the Football Moguls. Six weeks in and the Biscuits are undefeated, achieving a win mark that took two seasons to do prior. The Golden Boys of Boston have knocked off three teams that are still ranked within the top ten of the Power Rankings, and don't show any signs of stopping.

Led by Timothy Thompson (pronounced Ti-`mo-thee, he'll remind you) with a 106.00 QB rating and a swath of young talent around him on offense, they are pushing the ball down the field on the ground and through the air. Newly acquired Kicker Julian Romeo formerly of the Irvine Anteaters has been killing it through the uprights with 20/21 completions through these first six games. On defense, newcomer Max Dicken--a rookie defensive end--has been a whirling dervish, generating 33 QB hurries and 4 sacks, while veteran Randall Knox gives the defense the leadership and guidance needed.

It is a long season, and a lot can happen, but right now, the Biscuits are hungry. Hungry for that buttery, flaky sensation that each win gives them in pursuit of the next step.

Love it

TWO WINS!

I can hear you all tremble from here...